Many leaders possess the skills to manage tasks but lack the self-awareness needed to truly inspire and unify their teams. Self-awareness—understanding how our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors affect ourselves and those around us—is a powerful leadership tool that drives better communication, stronger relationships, and lasting team performance. In this blog, we explore the importance of self-awareness for managers and leaders, the difference between internal and external self-awareness, and practical ways to cultivate it for personal growth and professional success.
“Self-leadership is about awareness, tolerance, and not letting your own natural tendencies limit your potential.”
Scott Belsky, American entrepreneur and author
Some supervisors have the technical skills and experience to manage their group’s workload but lack the critical interpersonal skills to unify and empower them. Many leaders are focused and driven but don’t have the self-knowledge to lead high-performing teams. Self-awareness is not just a tool but a source of empowerment for managers and leaders, giving them confidence in their roles. In this blog, let’s delve into self-awareness, its benefits, and the difference between internal and external self-awareness. We’ll also discuss how high-performing managers and leaders use self-awareness to achieve unity, improve communication and ultimately realize the best in themselves and their teams.
What is Self-Awareness?
Self-awareness is recognizing and understanding our emotions, thoughts and values and how they influence our behaviors. It is a fundamental life skill and a core component of social-emotional learning that acknowledges that the self is distinct from others. It includes knowing ourselves, our character, strengths, weaknesses, limitations, likes and dislikes. Self-awareness can help us assess our mental, physical and emotional states and understand how various aspects of our personality affect our interactions with the external world. Self-awareness allows us to recognize when we are stressed or under pressure and is required for effective communication, positive interpersonal relations and empathy development. In other words, self-awareness is knowing who we are and how we’re actually perceived.
Self-aware people:
- Have humility.
- Are accountable.
- Can forgive others for their mistakes.
- Are aware of their strengths, weaknesses, values and principles.
- Correctly identify their emotions.
- Are self-confident.
- Understand the connection between their thoughts, feelings and behaviors.
- Have an accurate and realistic self-perception.
- Are willing to accept feedback.
- Believe they can change and grow.
- Define their beliefs without the influence of others.
- Believe they can achieve their goals.
- Can reflect on their experiences and identify lessons learned.
- Recognize coping strategies.
People with low self-awareness often cannot empathize, identify and express emotions accurately, or understand how their words and deeds make others feel. Some associated behaviors include arrogance, blaming others for their mistakes and taking credit for other people’s work. Whether or not this lack of self-awareness is due to being genuinely unaware or because they don’t care depends on their intentions. Unaware people sincerely want to collaborate and succeed but don’t realize they’re coming up short. Those who are aware but don’t care know precisely how they’re behaving and how it’s affecting people but won’t consider changing.
The Benefits of Self-Awareness
The benefits of self-awareness are numerous for the individual and those around them. Self-aware people make better decisions, communicate more effectively and build stronger relationships. They are also more empathetic, confident, creative and trusted. In a 2015 study, researchers discovered that self-awareness training for employees resulted in improved well-being and job satisfaction, increased confidence, more robust communication and a greater appreciation for the experiences and viewpoints of others. Self-awareness is also a component of emotional intelligence, a key trait good managers and leaders use to ensure their teams feel safe and comfortable at work while performing at their highest levels.
Internal vs. External Self-Awareness
Everyone has different levels of self-awareness, which usually fall into two categories: internal and external.
Internal self-awareness is a clear perception of our personal values, beliefs and goals and how they correspond to our environment, responses (thoughts, feelings, behaviors, strengths and weaknesses), and affect others. It’s associated with increased job and relationship satisfaction, personal and social control and happiness. When you don’t understand your personal values, beliefs or goals, this can lead to stress, anxiety and depression. Managers and leaders who lack a strong sense of self and what they stand for might feel frustrated by their weak interpersonal connections and inability to inspire and motivate their team.
External self-awareness means accurately understanding how others perceive us. Studies show that people who know how others see them are better at empathizing and accepting others’ points of view. Managers and leaders who view themselves as their team members do typically have stronger relationships with their teams because they feel comfortable being themselves, expressing their thoughts and ideas and asking for help.
An imbalance between the two types can occur when someone is crystal clear in their beliefs and motivations but doesn’t look for blind spots or challenge their own views by seeking feedback. Having internal but no external awareness can harm relationships and impede success. Constructive feedback is critical for managers and leaders to develop self-awareness and grow. Another imbalance can occur when someone is so focused on how others perceive them that they overlook their own values and goals. Focusing only on external self-awareness can lead them to choices that don’t contribute to their success or fulfillment.
How to Develop Your Self-Awareness
When your team understands your core values and feels comfortable expressing their emotions without judgment, you create an environment where meaningful and productive group interactions happen. Reflect on the characteristics of great managers or leaders you’ve had in the past; what qualities stand out? How can you develop some of those same qualities? Ask yourself questions like:
- How am I feeling and why?
- When am I at my best?
- When do I feel frustrated or angry?
- What kind of person do I want to be today?
- What stresses me out?
Know Thyself
Self-reflection is an ongoing process. Make a list of your core values, beliefs, strengths and weaknesses. Enhance your emotional intelligence by taking the time to recognize and accurately identify your emotions and those of your team. Read up on emotional intelligence to learn how to be considerate of your teammates’ emotions.
Identify How Others Perceive You
One way to assess how your actions affect others in the workplace is to observe or reflect on how they react to you. Identify what factors cause them to respond in a certain way so you can understand your impact on others.
Gather Feedback
It’s challenging to disconnect your personal biases as you self-assess, so ask people you trust for their input to obtain a clearer idea of who you are and how you relate to others. Ask them for insight regarding specific behaviors or traits to pinpoint areas for self-improvement. Look for indirect feedback as well. Review comments others have made about you—have people offered advice without you asking?
Show Empathy
Consider the thoughts and feelings of the people you manage or lead by listening carefully to hear the meaning behind their communication. Look beyond their words and pay attention to nonverbal cues such as tone, facial expression and hand gestures to gain insight into their emotions while speaking with them. Caring about the emotional needs of your team will help guide your decisions and relationships to become a more self-aware leader.
Self-awareness is an essential characteristic of any high-performing manager or leader. It is crucial for decision-making, team cohesion and creating a more connected and empathetic workplace.
Anne Evenson is a native Austinite and a proud Veteran’s spouse with over 20 years of marketing, communications and program coordination experience in the public, private and nonprofit sectors. She is also a sculptor, jeweler and all-around dabbler in the arts and loves to help military-connected individuals discover their inner creativity.
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